My reality is someone else’s fantasy. My truth is someone else’s lie. Truth that I was told would harm me and cause me distress when in reality only has caused harm and stress to both of us. I have made a choice and refuse to live under that kind of condemnation anymore. I have freedom in Christ and nothing can trump that.
I grew up in a house of lies and sexual immorality. Where it was easier to live in the fantasy then reality. Where truth was held over your head as though it was a noose ready to lasso your neck and hang you. Where your real family as a adolescent were the Walton’s or the Engels and as a teenager you longed to run away to California and maybe that one mom who you adored and wanted to be just like on that soap opera would find pity on you and adopt you. Where you wondered why no one cared about the way you were being treated and maybe this was normal and I was the weirdo. Where the thought of your parents being there when you went to bed and when you woke up was simply fantasy. That mom baking cookies, making you a dinner, washing your cloths and making sure you had proper hygiene was not what everybody really did. Where you were encouraged to finish your education. To continue to college and do better then your parents. Where love came with no strings, no conditions and you could trust another human being.
“So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, The crawling locust, The consuming locust, And the chewing locust, My great army which I sent among you. You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, And praise the name of the Lord your God, Who has dealt wondrously with you; And My people shall never be put to shame. Then you shall know that I am in the midst of Israel: I am the Lord your God And there is no other. My people shall never be put to shame.
Joel 2:25 – 26 NKJV
My fantasy as a child has become my reality as an adult. The lord is good and has reconciled all I had lost and continues to do so. I have been able to be all those things to my kids that I hoped for myself. I walk in forgiveness and victory over the lies of the enemy everyday. I have to remember that forgiveness isn’t a feeling. It isn’t condoning their actions and its most definitely not for them. There is no way that the ones who stole my childhood could repay me all that was lost but as I walk in forgiveness the Lord restores.